Hi everyone,
I don't have a lot of viewer so please, pass this message to your viewers in dA, for all Earth lovers.

This Friday June 5th is the International Day of Environment. For this even, there's been a movie that has been made, that will be free for viewing on the web, on TV, and will be on sale on a lower price in DVD, etc. It's goal is not profit, but to spread the message about the deteriorating health of our home and beloved planet Earth. The title is "Home".

Here's a preview: [link]
You can find the official website here: [link]

I think we need to bound ourselves together to help. If we, regular people, can't help those on the other side of the planet, I think that every single one of us can help were they are, by little daily actions like saving energy, use buses and subway instead of cars, by not using pesticide on their grass, by cleaning the car way with a broom instead of water, by recycling, by reusing objects instead of buying new all the time and throwing at the garbage the next day, by spreading the word, by boycotting industries that cares more about self-profits than life and the damages they cause today and for the generation to comes. We can start by getting informed and knowing what's going on

For all of us who are not blind to pollution and cares about their homeland, please spread the word!!

"Today" a year ago, I was finding out I was pregnant, and spent last St-Valentine evening at the clinic to get an "official confirmation". Today-Today, my daughter is 4 months old, recently discovered that she has feet and toes and tries to taste everything she get a grip at

While I try to teach her how to "walk on her belly", I'm almost done learning about healing herbs and how to transform them into natural homy products as salves, therapeutic oil, concentrated liquid, cream, soap, etc. (though the whole formation I'm in is not yet near completed...) and I try to get back on track with the Chinese Traditional Medicine that I'd had to put aside while I was pregnant.

I wish I would have more time for creating, but hey! I'm way too hungry of projects! Projects are for me like a buffet: all seams fun and tasty, so I fill my plate with more that I can eat!! :/ Breastfeeding a fast growing child is demanding a lot of energy, more that when I was pregnant!! but it's such an unexplainable joy that I don't wish to rush toward the day it's going to be over But still, I try to stay active enough... it's just that the choice between the activities can sometimes be hard. :/ Which one I pick and which one I have to put aside or refuse to do by lack of time and/or energy?

Anyway, the center of all this remains my daughter She is just a sweet kid, smiling almost all the time like a sunshine! I guess every parent say the same, but you know...

Hey guys,
I know everybody says that a baby change your life ; "of course it does!" I thought, but I guess I never thought that having a baby would change my life that much.

Since I'm 14, I knew that having a family was one of my main goals, but I was so scared at the same time! I was afraid of who I was, what I could do wrong, I was torn inside with pain and sorrow (I guess it's easy to get that just by looking at my "fine art" folio, with the drawings/paintings I was doing back in college!)

So I thought to myself, back when I was 14, that I would do all in my power, to change myself, cut the chains of the past, find my own happiness, a spread it around me, like a treasure so great that you can't keep it all for yourself.

The path to happiness can be hard. But most importantly, I've discovered in my quest, that happiness is not something you look for outside ; it's not about having a good job, lots of money, lots of friends, vacations on the beach and such. I realized that happiness is something you can only find inside yourself, like a fragile flower piecing the snow. You have to take care of it, keep it warm, nourish, watered, lighted, and than it will grow and spread out contagiously.

On the way, I have purified my life, keeping "quality friends" instead of "quantity of friends", I have search for a job I could enjoy, instead of one that would make me rich, and I also discovered that without health, not much is possible. By watching my mother die of breast cancer, by seeing how the medicine around me is about money, lobby and pride, instead of being about life, I've reached a new step. That is when I've decided to study in alternative health care, traditionnal eastern medicine, herbalism and nutrition, to work in prevention rather than suffering. I felt so released when the Grandmaster Nam Anh, my teacher in Eastern Traditional Medicine was saying "In your world, medicine is a profession. Where I come from, it's a devotion" ; I felt released because that's what I thought it should be and by the time I met the Grandmaster, I was starting to believe I was an utopist!

More I walk in life path, more I discover how to feel better about myself and share to anyone who cares, more I change for the best! When some of my old friends from back to kitten garden are saying: "Remember (..) back then, life was good, easy..." but I never totally agree. Yes, I have good memories, but ever single step I took in life, I felt like "I never felt that good before", and it keeps building up like that. Last year, I've crossed 30 years old and for many, "we start to get old". I'm sorry, I don't feel old! In fact, I feel younger! I feel light! Life is good!

And then, I felt like I was ready to reach my goal of having a family. I was with the same man for 8 years, stable relation, a man I thought was a good mate for me, and could be also a good father. So there it is, I gave birth 3½ months ago. I've discovered unconditional love! I am so in love, it's now hard to imagine how it could be when we'll have other children. Never before I could imagine that a love that strong was possible! And I look at all what fills my closet, and I feel like, for the third time, all those closes are not mine anymore, like if I died and was reborn again for the third time. The time where I was torn and unhappy was already gone away, like if it was the bad memory of a past nightmare or a past life, when I made peace with my dying mother. But now, it happens again! All that black and that blue still in my closet, really, it's not me anymore! I feel almost dusty and black clouded to wear those color!

Anyway, all this little story to say: "Don't be afraid of the change". Like a Chinese proverb says: "All changes, except the change" (humm... this feels like a bad translation). To sit down, seek inside what feels wrong, admit it, try to understand how to undo it, go over it, change, and fills that empty spot with something that feels right, is not easy steps. I came to understand in my path that not everybody is willing to do those changes ; I was surprise to see that many stay there saying "I'm not like that", instead of finding a solution and apply it. Please, do it. Have courage, trust life. What saved me, back when I was 14 years old and willing to die, was "If perfection does not exist, it's opposite can't either! So if I feel like I'm in the bottom of imperfection that life can get, then my life can only balance itself by getting better", and I hold myself to that thought so hard and I did anything to make it happen, to get this idea to come true. And it did! Really! Believe you can do it, and than do it!

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(Updated, December 4th 2008)
Hehe, I have to catch up time!

My baby girl is born :dancing: , 3 days before her due date, meaning October 13th; she's 7 weeks and a half now. She is born into water (my little mermaid ) after 2½ hours of labor and was very strong & healthy. She was 49 cm long and weighted 4,5 kg (she's now 6 kg and very tall for her age, like her mom) and has black hair and dark chocolate brown eyes, like her mom too .

She is an easy child, joyful, sleeping 4 hours in a row at night right when she got home, 8 hours in a row at night after 3 weeks (when she started to smile). She's not (yet) interested with toys, but very curious, specially with colors, people or what mom & dad are doing. She is watching, always watching; many professional working every day with babies are amazed how much she's "all there" and curious.

I'm not sure yet if I'll put some pictures on the web. Though she's the most beautiful thing on Earth to my eyes, I never been comfortable to put some friends and family or personal picture on the web, so I don't know yet if I'll change that or not...


(Updated, September 29th 2008)
About 2 weeks and 1/2 before I give birth, though at this time, it can happen any time!!

(Updated, August 26th 2008)
Hi guys,
I should have updated this journal a while ago, but it seems too many things happens to me at the same time!!

You see, I'm giving birth in about 6 weeks from now to my first baby while I'm trying to finish some "summer homeworks", prepare to leave work (training someone to replace me) and prepare for back to school (more by correspondence for some time, but IF POSSIBLE, try not to get "too late" on my studies planing).

I'll stop working September 12th and I'm due for October 16th; waiting for a girl. All is going well. Though it's my first pregnancy and can't compare, it feel rather easy for me, no problems, slight discomforts like a bit of tiredness, mostly at the end of the day, but I'm practically more energic than some non-pregnant girls at work!! Baby moves a lot, energic too, but no kicking, she pushes though and can be very strong at it!!

So maybe a new type of picture coming up!!

To keep going with the news, on my herbal medicine classes, where I was planing for opening a private consultation office, my artistic paws have found appealing toward the fabrication of natural body products (such as soap (bar & liquid), body cream, salves, etc.) with medicinal herbs, so I might get out of there with 2 diplomas instead!! Also, about 30% of the treatment of pathologies class is about nutrition. I like it so much, I might (after finishing those 2 programs) go for a full nutritionist diploma afterward!!

Anyway, many good things at the horizon!
For now, I can't wait to stop working, rest more and finishing the preparation for the coming of my angle



(Oct 20, 2007)
Hey guys,

Just a brief message to talk about the fact I'm presently "back to school"...

I'm learning the "herbal medecine" and though it's a traditional medicine, this class adapts it to today's lifestyle, meaning good knowledge of anatomy, botanic and interaction with pharmaceutic drugs.

Combine with working in the same time, obviously, I have little time for myself, so I'm sorry if I'm not as present as I used to ; I lurk once in a while to watch new stuff and and if I can, to answer back a couple of comments... I really appreciate your support guys on my old stuff Thank you !

I must get back to it now (good thing for me that I enjoy everything I study! )

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The first photography I've upload here, were from film, that I had to scan, modify, blablabla... For many (obvious) reasons, I wanted to buy myself a digital camera... which I've been able to do last summer.

I'm pretty glad of it, but one other thing happened too : I've noticed that, on other monitor, my pictures were... not as beautiful than the way I see them on my screen... My monitor is a bit old, but was top quality. With time, I first notice it was way darker than others (you can see that my oldest pictures are ok, and then, they are too blasted...) and lately, I've noticed that on other screens, they are way too "noisy". I don't see that noise on my monitor...

So, there's something about handling my new camera, versus what I see on my computer before the upload... but I do see that there's something wrong, and I'm working hard to correct this issue. I've tested the "RAW" option, but ended up with more problem (I've noticed I'm not the only one with those problems) anyway...

It's a bit frustrating, when you're sure to have a good quality picture, upload it in the folio, and turns out to be not as good as you thought... But I know there's not perfect, so I'm still searching it fix this (maybe having a new (good) screen will help, but it's really not a good time now... and since I'm picky and I'm a photoshop-with-tablet maniac, and only wish for a wacom cintiq [link] ...and counting the fact I'm going back to study... it's not tomorrow the day...)

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